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Status updates are wonderful tools to inform friends on the happenings of your daily life. They just are not effective when they are incorrect (grammatically).

Jenna Molle is you is the one for me. 9 minutes ago - Comment -

you are the one for me.

Kelley James Just landed at LAX - getting in a cab and saying "santa monica please" is gonna make me a happy kid.

"Santa Monica please," is going to

Alexis Van Vleet is.

incomplete sentence. is what?

Mara Ann Browning has had the perfect week, stratch that, I've had the best 2 months of my life!..

scratch that

Jake Klein is ash wendsday liturgy ne one, 8:30.

Ash Wednesday liturgy anyone at 8:30 p.m.?

Rachel Bilson, Hayden Christensen to wed

I found this on Wikipedia about Rachel Bilson. It just doesn't make any sense.

It's was confirm there annouce her engagement to Hayden Christensen.

<sup>It was to confirm and announce her engagement to Hayden Christensen.

link: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rachel_Bilson</sup>

Spanglish

Our chef was a little confused this week for Thursday evening's menu.

Phonetically, it makes sense. Wikipedia let me in on the logistics: The word comes from Spanish, and literally means "little cheesy thing" or "cheesie" (from queso, or "cheese", + ada, an adjectival suffix, + illa, a diminutive suffix). Quesadilla.

fmylife.com

this site is good for more than just laughs, you can also practice grammar

1. Today, we gave my friend a surprise party. He then had a seizure, and now he is in the hospital for a week. FML

passive use | Then he had a seizure


2. Today, I dropped my 400 dollar iphone, that's been through toilets and 6 foot falls, on a walmart floor and shattered the screen. I managed, however, to catch the 2 dollar macaroni and cheese before it hit the ground. FML

contraction use | that has, not that is


3. Today, while at work I was reading "The Very Hungry Caterpillar" to me class of 5 year olds. I got near the end of the book and said "Look at the big fat caterpillar" to which one of my pupils replied "Just like you, Miss!" FML

ownership | my class of 5-year-olds


4. Today, I drank a ton of beers for my 25th birthday. My friends love to watch me open beer bottles with my teeth. I chipped both of my front uppers doing this. I'm no longer covered by my parents dental insurance because I'm 25 now. FML

ownership | parent's dental insurance

5. Today, at the gym, I see a person laying unconscious on the ground with people crowded around. Previously being a lifeguard, and knowing CPR, I ran over and asked a man what happened, preparing to check his vitals. I then realized that the body was a dummy and the employees were doing a drill. FML

lay vs. lie | I see a person lying unconscious

lunch specials eberyday?

clearly the talented artist behind this sign is confused, everyday.